Thursday, November 24, 2011

30 Days of Being Thankful

Happy Thanksgiving to all!! Today I am thankful for a lot of things! A lot of my friends were posting 1 thing a day that they were thankful for, but instead I made one big list. I of course am thankful for so much, but here are a few things that I thought of!

* My husband - He is my everything and my best friend. I am so thankful that he is part of my life and that we have the relationship that we have.

* Baby Squirrel - Even though the baby hasn't made it's appearance yet I am so in love and thankful for this baby. After a lot of trying and heart break, we have a beautiful baby on the way who I can't wait to meet!

* My Family - I have a wonderful, loving and supportive family. They may be a little crazy and drive me nuts at times, but they are mine and I am so thankful for them

* My grandpa - He is no longer with us, but I am thankful for him every single day. He was an amazing man. He taught me so much. I can feel him with me every day, and I truly believe he had a part in me being pregnant with baby squirrel. I am not sure how to fully put into words how thankful I am to have had my Pap in my life.

* Our home - It may be falling apart in places and it is a work in progress, but we have a roof over our heads and a place we call home. There are so many people who don't have something that I take for granted sometimes, and I am truly am grateful that I have a home.

* My friends - I have made a lot of amazing friends over the years and I am thankful for each and every one of them. I don't live near most of them any more, but I love chatting with them when I can. Even from 1,000+ miles away my friends bring a smile to my face and I don't know what I would do with out them.

* The Marine Corps - The Marine Corps never makes life simple and they have taken my husband away from for more time than I care to count, but I can't imagine our life any differently. It is a way of life that is not for everyone, but I am thankful for all the Marines have done for us and all things that have come from our experiences.

* To have my husband stateside - I am so thankful to have my wonderful husband home. He is in the US, in the same state and same city as me AND he comes home every night!

* Our military family - When you are part of the military, you are frequently far away from your family, but the other military families become your second family. I am lucky enough to have my mom in town, but I still have my military family too. They are people who understand the life and what you are going through.

* For being pregnant - I am thankful that I am pregnant during the holidays because that means I get to eat whatever I want and no one can say a word!

* My pregnancy pillow - Seriously! Without it, there would be no hope of getting any sleep at night these days!

* The local YMCA - I have been taking a prenatal swim class and I am so thankful for my 45min twice a week that I get to get in the pool and get the weight of the baby out of my pelvis!

* Music -"Music Washes away from the soul, the everyday dust of life." enough said...

* Everything my husband does - He works 12+ hours a day 6 days a week and he still finds time to get things done around the house to help me out. I'd be lost with out him.

* Food in the cupboards - I have a kitchen full of food. This time of year it becomes more apparent that many people don't have enough food to go around. I am thankful that we have plenty of food to go around.

* My husband - because even after a long day he calls to see what I need him to pick up and he goes out of his way to make me smile.

* My husband - because he looks damn good in a uniform!

* The way my family celebrates thanksgiving - for as long as I can remember we always invited people who didn't have anywhere else to go. No one should spend thanksgiving alone and no one should eat take out on thanksgiving! Since my husband and I have been married we have kept this up and always invite those that may be alone. It doesn't matter if we have 5 or 35 people around the table already...there is always room for one more.

* My mom - I am so thankful to have her live close again and I am constantly thankful for all that she does for us

* Cell phones - because without them I would lose touch with the world and wouldn't be able to catch up with friends and family.

* My in-laws - because even though I complain about them sometimes and get frustrated, they really are great people and they always come through for us in the end!

* Modern technology - because I got to see my baby's sweet chubby face today! I am so in love with my little (or not so little) butterball!! I can't wait to meet him or her!

I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving! Enjoy your family and friends and don't forget to be thankful for all that you have!

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Making New Friends

Friendship is a funny thing when you are an adult.

I have found that the older I get, the harder it is to make friends.

As a kid, and even a teenager, you are at the same place in you life as most of your peers, but as you get older that changes.

I got married pretty young, which instantly put me in a different place than my friends. While I was going to school full time, working 2-3 jobs and coming home to my husband every night, they were full time students who had part time jobs and partied full time. I tried so hard to stay in touch with my friends, but they were quick to write me off, because I lived a "boring" life in comparison to their party filled lives.

In the years between being written off by long time childhood friends and today I have made a small handful of friends whom I love very much. the problem is that we don't live in the same cities anymore. Hell, we don't even live in the same time zones!

A year ago, we moved to a new city. I have been trying since we got here to make some friends, but as an adult this has been no easy task.

I have found that most people my age are just in a different place in their lives and have no interest in a married gal with a baby on the way. Then there are the people who have kids, but aren't interested in being friends because I don't technically have a kid yet. My favorite though, are the people that have all of their friends and don't seem to be interested in making any new ones.

Two of the guys that my husband works with have wives close to my age. I was friendly with both of them and we hung out from time to time, but once they met each other I ceased to exist. They both have kids so they hang out all the time. They have no problem calling me when they need a baby sitter, but when it comes to doing something fun I am not invited.

Maybe they think I wouldn't be interested, but really I just want friends and I would love to hang out.

Why does it have to matter if I have kids or if I am married or what I do for a living? Why can't it be like when we were 7?

I am so sick of trying to maintain and/or build new friendships when the other person doesn't give a shit. I am done helping other people, when they never reciprocate. I am sick of being forgotten by people. Mostly, I am sick of being used by other people. All I want is a friend. A friend to get together with, someone to talk to, someone who doesn't just want to use me.

Making friends as an adult SUCKS!!

Friday, October 21, 2011

Gender Predictions

I blogged a few weeks ago about the gender predictions I have been doing. This week marks single digit weeks until Baby Squirrel makes it's appearance and I couldn't be more excited!

I decided to recap the gender predictions on this blog because in a few more weeks I am going to start a pool for people to guess Baby Squirrels gender and stats and the winner will get a gift from the babe!

Gender Predictions:

Chinese Gender Chart - BOY
 The chart tells you if it is a boy or girl based on your age, the year and when you concieved
Ring Test - BOY
 A wedding ring tied to a string will swing in circles when held over your belly if you are having a boy and back and forth if you are having a girl
Intelligender - BOY (I have PCOS, so of course it said boy!)
 A kit you buy at the drug store. You pee on some powder and see what color it turns, but it says right on the box it is not meant for people with PCOS...
Color of Pee - GIRL
 If your pee is a bright yellow you are having a boy and if it is a dull yellow you are having a girl
Moms Skin - BOY
 If mom has acne during pregnancy it is a girl and clear, glowing skin means boy
Ask a 5 Year Old - BOY
 5 year olds are very intuitive and they will tell you if it is a boy or girl
Toddler Boys - BOY
 If a toddler boy shows interest in an expectant mom she is having a girl, if the toddler boy shows no interest then she is having a boy
Clumsiness - BOY
 If a mom to be is extra clumsy she is having a boy, but if she is more graceful, she is having a girl
Needle Test - GIRL
 This is a complicated one that my mom did...she held a needle over my belly and asked questions. The needle moved according to the answer to each question. (I can explain better another day)
Boiled Cabbage - BOY
 Boil cabbage then add equal parts cabbage water and urine. If the liquid turns purple it's a girl and red it is a boy
Leg Hair - BOY
 If a mom to be has leg hair that grows like crazy it is a boy, if the hair is normal then it is a girl

Cravings - GIRL
 If you are craving salty things you are having a boy and sweet cravings means a girl
Sleeping Side - GIRL
 If you are more comfortable on your left side it signifies a boy and more comfortable on your right side signifies a girl
Dad's Weight Gain - GIRL
 If the dad to be gains weight you are having a girl and if he loses weight or stays the same, you are having a boy. In my husbands defense...he recently quit smoking (GO HIM!!) which could be the reason for the weight gain!

I have done 14 gender tests, 5 have said I'm having a GIRL and 9 have said I am having a BOY.

Right now the odds are saying it is a boy, but we will know for sure in 9 weeks!! I am so excited and I can't wait to meet my little squirrel! :)

Friday, September 30, 2011

Military Spouse Friday Fill-in

Fridays are Military spouse Friday fill-in days over at Wife of a Sailors Blog. It is a fun way to get to know other military spouses and learn about each other each week.

Here is this weeks Friday Fill-in:

1. I always feel like I’m     84      years old, but in reality, I’m far younger than that.

I am to the point in my pregnancy where I am getting very uncomfortable and it is difficult to move. Sometimes it takes me 5 minutes just to get off the couch!

2. I wish my family understood better when I tell them I am allergic to dogs.  
I am severely allergic to dogs and my in-laws just DON'T get it! When we go to their house they refuse to put the dogs outside or in the basement. My husband will put them in the basement and then EVERYONE goes down to be with them because they are lonely...leaving me upstairs...ALONE! I was there a few weeks ago and they let their 100+lb jump up and shove his paws into my pregnant belly. The dogs can't b left outside or in the basement, but it's ok for me to have to go sit on the front porch in the snow so that I can catch my breath and stop wheezing. It's not like they are small dogs either. They have a 100+lb golden with TONS of fur and a 50ish lb pit/lab mix. SO damn frustrating!

3. If you saw me when I feel like getting pretty , you’d think I was a total girly-girl, but if you saw me any other day , you’d think I was a tomboy through-and-through. 
I do love to get dressed up. I love a cute pair of heels, a pretty dress and make-up! I love to feel pretty and sexy, I just don't take the time to do it very often. I am a billion years pregnant and if I put make-up on I just sweat it off in about 3.2 minutes. And seriously...lets not even talk about trying to fit my giant swollen ankles into a cute pair of heels!

4. I feel like I’m in a totally different universe when I'm with military families vs civilian families.  
I have a lot of military friends and I have a lot of civilian friends. I absolutely adore all of them for their own reasons. The military world is just so different than the civilian world. A milspouse friend of mine posted this on Facebook yesterday and it kind of explains the difference:

Civilian wives will get angry and snotty if your child is misbehaving, military wives will come outside yell at your kid and then let you know they did it

Civilian wives will tell a neighbor child to go home when dinner is ready, military wives expect that all children in their home will be eating with them

Civilian wives get angry if their husband is late and doesn’t call, military wives are ...grateful if they get a call this week
Civilian wives expect their casserole dish to be returned, military wives aren’t exactly sure who owns what

Civilian wives think men look good in uniforms, military wives think one man looks good in a uniform

Civilian wives get excited when the doorbell rings, military wives don’t

Civilian wives ask their friends if they can help, military wives don’t give their friends the option

Civilian wives get annoyed when plans change, military wives are surprised when they don’t

Civilian wives ask if their child can come play, military wives call and say “Hey is my kid over there?”

Civilian wives get angry when they trip over their husbands shoes, military wives would do anything to have to pick up their husbands boots

Civilian Wives hate their husbands’ stinky shirts, military wives snuggle up to them at night.
 I don't agree with all the statements, but some of them are so true. And, for the record, I truly love all my friends the same. I don't value military friends over civilian friends or vice versa. I value my friends for who they are and the different relationships that we have!!

5. In honor of this being MFF #60… 60 months ago  (exactly 5 years ago, so September 30, 2006) I lived in a duplex in San Diego, CA with a roommate and my life was totally different because of SO many reasons.
It was my freshman year of college and I was living with a milspouse. I was not married, but I was engaged to my husband. My fiance and the roommates husband were deployed to Japan. I was a full time student, working 40hrs a week and partying like it was my job. I was living off of $20 a week for food and struggling to make the bills, but I was too proud to ask for help. It was a time in my life where I learned so much about myself and what I was capable of and I learned so much about life and the world. I would never trade that time of my life for anything! Plus, I truly feel like that deployment helped my relationship with my husband (fiance at the time) grow! 

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Gender Predictions

SO...I have a super secret (not really) blog with baby stuff on it. I have been doing gender predictions to find out what Baby Squirrel is going to be. My lovely husband and I have decided not to find out the sex of our baby so I have been having fun with the old wives tales trying to guess what the baby will be. I posted another one today, so I thought I would share it here.

Yesterday I was 28 weeks pregnant!

That means I have officially entered my 3rd trimester!

This is getting real now! Just 12 short weeks from now I will be meeting my sweet little baby!

This week I am going to tackle the old wives tale about cravings.

A friend of mine from culinary school told me about this old wives tale yesterday, so I decided to share it here. According to this tale if the mother to be is craving sweet snacks she is going to have a girl. If the mother to be is craving salty snacks she is going to have a boy.

Courtesy of Google Images

My food cravings have been fairly regular throughout this whole pregnancy. Early on when I was nauseous ALL the time, all I could eat was cinnamon raisin bagels with peanut butter. From about week 12 on I have craved orange juice and mashed potatoes. The last 3 weeks ALL I have wanted is a yellow cake cupcake with chocolate frosting!! (In fact, I am still dreaming of that damn cupcake!)

Courtesy of Google Images

All of those foods are sweets...well, except the mashed potatoes. But, for the most part I have craved sweets, which means that I am having...A GIRL!!

That brings our totals now to:

Boy: 9 - 75%
Girl: 3 - 25%

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Worry and Panic

Panic has started to set in.

I am 26 weeks and 5 days pregnant and I have started to panic.

I have been panicing about everything!

Early in this pregnancy we decided to forgo the testing for downs syndrom and other chromosomal abnormalities. It was not covered by our insurance and for other various personal reasons we decided not to go down that road.

While I am still certain that we made the right choice, I have started to panic thinking that something is going to wrong with my baby. I feel like if something is wrong, it is all my fault and somehow by not having that test I have hurt my baby. (*If you want to judge me for not having the test, be my guest, but please keep it to yourself!)

I worry, all day long, that I am not going to be a good mom. What if my kid doesn't like me? What if I am just a crappy mom? Am I going to ruin my child's life?

I want to have a relationship with my child like I have with my mom. My dad and I don't really have a great relationship. I was always trying to please him and I was never good enough. I don't ever want my child to feel that way...EVER! I worry my child will feel that way about me though.

I have 13 weeks to go, but we have so much to do around our house. I worry that it won't get done. I worry that we will have to bring the baby home to a crappy house that is a nightmare for a baby because of all the unfinished projects laying around.

Basically, in a nut shell...I am a nut! I am panicking about the little things and worry about things I have no control over.

I need to get my overly emotional self together and relax. All this stress can't be good for the baby! (One more thing to add my list of things to worry about!)

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

A Big Day!

Today is a big day in our house...

Today I am 24 weeks pregnant.

24 weeks...should I have to deliver after this point, the odds of survival are pretty good. I feel like after today I can really take a big deep breath and relax a little. I know that won't happen, but I can do it if I want. :)

Today I am 13 weeks from being full term.

Today I am 16 weeks from my due date.

This is getting real folks. In just 16 weeks I will be holding my sweet baby squirrel! That is so painfully exciting! I really want to scream from the roof tops that I get to meet my baby in just 16 weeks.

I love watching my husband get excited about meeting our baby. Some days he gets so excited, he is almost giddy! He can't wait to meet our baby squirrel either.

But, what really makes today a big HUGE day in our house...

I am taking out my tongue ring.

I got my tongue pierced while I was college and my husband was deployed overseas. I had to do it while he was gone because he doesn't like piercings. He is ok with tattoo, but he thinks that piercings are mutilating your body.

He didn't hate the piercing or anything, he just isn't a fan. When I did it, years ago, I promised that I would take it out when I got pregnant with our first child. That's when it is truly time to grow up.

When I got pregnant this time I didn't take it out right away because I know that things can change very quickly. I'd had it happen before, so I told my husband that I would take it out when I was 12 weeks pregnant and the risk of miscarriage went way down.

When the 12 week mark came and went, I said I would take it out eventually.

A few weeks ago he asked me when it was going to come out. I told him it would be out before that baby made it's entrance into the world. But apparently that wasn't a good enough answer for him. He wanted a date. So after so serious feet dragging I decided I would take it out at 24 weeks. Viability.

Sunday night my lovely husband reminded me that Tuesday was the "BIG" day. I'm not going to lie...I got a little panicky. I don't know why, but I did.

Taking my tongue ring out means that this is real...I am really going to be a MOM!!

So there ya have it is a big day in our house. All because I am taking my tongue ring out...and of course because I am 24 weeks pregnant and I get to meet my baby sooner rather than later!

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Remembering a Hero. Our Hero. And the Foundation of Our Family.

On Saturday August 6 my family held a memorial service for my grandpa.

He passed away on November 5, 2007 at the age of 87. My grandmother followed him just a few short months later on April 17, 2008 just 2 months shy of her 90th birthday. They had been married for 65 years, raised 4 children, had 10 grandchildren and 10 great grandchildren.

My grandpa fought in World War II. He was a Major in the US Army. He served throughout Europe while his wife was at home with their youngest child. He was shot in the war and spent a full year in a hospital recovering. For his service to our country he received two purple hearts.

With his death and funeral falling so close to Veteran's day there were not enough people to give him his full military honors that he deserved. For that reason, we had a memorial service to remember the two people who meant so much to us.

They are both truly missed in our family and everyone was eager to be there to honor them.

The service was a full military honors service for my grandpa, but it was also a time to remember my grandma, who was the foundation of our family.

When my grandpa was choosing their burial plot years ago, he specifically chose a spot under a large tree. He always said that he chose that one so that when people came to visit them they would be comfortable in the shade. When we arrived at the cemetery that Saturday it was raining. When the service was about to start the family gathered under the tree to get out of the rain, just as he would have wanted. And then, as if he were watching over us, the rain stopped. It stopped just until everyone was in their car after the service, then it poured. But, we all knew he was there with us.

We buried them 4 years ago, but there is something so devastatingly final about the shots being fired and taps being play. It was like a wound that had been healing for almost 4 years had been freshly opened again. I have missed my grandpa every single day, but this day I felt like the hole in my heart was being ripped open.
My amazing husband was a part of the ceremony and he read the meaning of folding the flag as they folded it. He loved my grandpa and my grandpa loved him like he was his own grandson. He was so proud of him for being a Marine. I know he was honored to have him be part of it all.

After the military portion of the service was finished, we had a family service. The ivy wreath was empty and each person came up and told a story about my grand parents. As each person finished their story they put a flower in the wreath. It was such a wonderful way to remember them. Even a few of the great grand kids that are old enough to remember them stood in front of us and spoke. People spoke of how they know they are with us every day, funny stories or something they will never forget.

The memory wreath looked really nice when we were done. Before we left the cemetery My mom and aunt filled a small vase with flowers, one for each person who couldn't be there. They now have 16 great grand children and the 17th is on the way, so they left a flower for each person so that they knew we were all thinking about them. 

My grandpa was one of the best people in my life. I saw him all the time. He always had an excuse to see me and to spend time together. When I was in high school my grandma went in to a nursing home. I went and visited with her 3 days a week and I would drive out to his house 2-3 times a week just to chat with him. I would call to tell him I was on my way and he would put a beer and a soda in the freezer. When I got there we would sit and chat over drinks. I loved spending time with him. When I moved away he bought a cell phone so he could call me and I wouldn't get charged for it. We had a weekly phone date.

I am certain that he is the reason I am pregnant. He always said we would be good parents. My due date is December 21, which I feel is his doing. He loved Christmas and in my crazy mind I feel like he is showing me that he loves our baby to be and that hes got our back.

I miss him.

I miss them both.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Military Spouse Friday Fill-in

 Every Friday Wifey of a Sailor does a Military Spouse fill-in. It is a fun way to get to know other military spouses. Head on over to her blog and check it out!  

Do you eat raw cookie dough?  
Why yes, yes I do! That's the whole reason to make cookies isn't it? I don't eat a whole batch, but a few bites here and there. :) My aunt used to tell us that we would get worms if we ate cookie dough...

When you get online for the first time of the day… what site do you immediately head to? 
I usually check Twitter and Facebook first. Gotta keep up with the social networking lol

What was your favorite pet as a child and why? 
As a kid I had fish and bunny rabbits. I loved my bunnies! I could pet them and hold them. I would let them out in the back yard and they would just hang out near where we were hanging out. They never left. My family has a plethora of pet allergies so we could only have rabbits because they lived outside.
I had chickens too, but they were mean. They liked me and would follow me around, but you couldn't really pet them of play with them, so the rabbits were cooler. Though I was quite a sight to see with 7 chickens following me in a line!

If you had a snail that could magically grant wishes, what would you name it?  
I would name it dead. I hate snails! I think they are gross and slimy. I think I would leave it nameless and once it had granted my wishes I would give it a shower of salt or a swim in a beer pool!

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop?
I have tried to count...I really have, but I get bored after about 100 licks and lose count. I do have to say that Tootsie Pops are one of my favorite candies! :) 


Saturday, July 16, 2011

I Just Thought You Were Overweight...

All my life I have been the fat kid.

As an adult, I finally came to terms with my body and that I was never going to skinny. And, finally, in the last few years...I was ok with that.

When I got pregnant I knew that I wouldn't have the cute little bump in the early weeks, and I was ok with that too. Even if no one else could see it, I knew that I was pregnant and that was all that mattered.

Yesterday, I was sitting in my mom's store with her business partner and her business partners son when a customer walked in. The two ladies were chatting and it came up that I was pregnant. The customer, an older lady, looked at me and said, "oh, I didn't realize you were pregnant, I just thought you were over weight."

At that point I could have just crawled in a hole and died.

When she asked me how far along I was, I told her I was almost 18 weeks. She looked at me and smiled as if to say, "I knew it! You really are fat!"

Needless to say, she left me feeling pretty low.  And, while I am still happy to know that my little squirrel is growing inside of me, I can't help but wonder...when am I going to feel pregnant and not just fat?

Thursday, July 7, 2011

My WTF day!

Today has been a weird day, with a capitol W!


I started out my day by running a few errands. The first store I went to was a local business that sells cloth diapers and I wanted to check them out. The woman who owns the store brings her 5 sons to work every day. As I was looking at diapers, one of the little boys squatted next to me and peed on the floor...

Yep. He peed. On the floor. Next to me!

Courtesy of Goggle Images

I left.

As I was driving to the next store I needed to go to I witnessed an accident. Not a big deal in this town, it happens all the time, and yes, everyone was ok. But it just added to the day.

I ran a few more errands with no trouble, but then as I was heading to my mom's store with lunch I witnessed ANOTHER accident. This was only 45 minutes after the first one. And it was only about a half mile away. This time it was just two little old ladies, who were too old to be driving, that slammed into each other. Again, everyone was ok, but really...I had witness ANOTHER traffic accident?!

After lunch with my mom I went home. I got a few things done at home and I had just sat down on the couch to work on a new knitting project. Just as I sat down I noticed a little old lady walking up my front steps. I got up so I could answer the door, but she just walked in.

Yep! Walked right in my front door. No knocking. Just walked in.

As she came in the door she looked at me and said, "am I in the right place?"

Uhhh...NO. Get the HELL out of my house!

Turns out she was looking for the office up the road that has the same address as I do. I live at 555 S. Wannabbaker Rd and she needed 555 N. Wannabbaker Rd. It happens all the time, but no one has ever just walked into my house! Not to mention the fact that my house most definitely looks like a house. Not a business!

I very happily gave the crazy old lady intruder directions to the correct location. She argued with me briefly and then headed on her crazy way. 
As she was walking out the door I noticed she was wearing a name tag. The tag said Sister Crazy Lady. Ok, so it didn't say crazy lady, but it did say sister. 

She is a NUN!! A nun just barged into my house today!

Courtesy of Google Images
After I recovered from the crazy old lady nun walking onto my house I left to take dinner up to the husband at his office. As I was walking to my front door Santa Claus rode by on a bicycle wearing neon green bike shorts.

That's right folks...Santa Claus. In bike shorts.

I wish I had pictures of that!

AT this point I should have called it a night, but I didn't. I decided to go to Walmart...after dark.

There really are no words to describe what I saw. Here are a few visuals, but if you would like more, please check out The People of Walmart.

Courtesy of I did not take these photos

I couldn't even get what I went to Walmart for...I had to leave. And FAST!

When I got home I was informed that THIS was going on in my home town. The guy is has killed 7 people including his own daughter and is holding 2 people hostage while snorting some sort of powder.

That isn't happening directly to me, but it just adds to this crazy messed up day!

I am going to go crawl into bed and hide under the covers where I am safe! Tomorrow has to be more normal!

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Getting Over Myself

We moved to southern Indiana last October and it is no secret that I have had a hard time adjusting. We lived in San Diego before we moved and I was spoiled.

I loved living in San Diego! It's a gorgeous city and there is so much to do. I had some really great friend and I had great fun. I always knew that it was not permanent. Nothing is in the military. But, that didn't stop me from being sad when we moved.

I have been finding all the negative at every turn since we moved to Indiana, but last night I realized it is time to get over myself. That life here is not all that bad.

Our friends who live down the road invited us to a BBQ last night. A few of thier neighbors get together for the 4th of July every year. They have BBQ with tons of food and then set off fireworks after dark. In Indiana fireworks are more than just sparklers, bottle rockets and snap pops. You can buy the HUGE fireworks that shoot WAY into the sky.

The BBQ was fun, it was good food and it was fun and refreshing to just sit around and chat with friends. The defining moment for me was when we sitting outside waiting for the guys to start the fireworks.

It was humid, just sitting still your skin is a little sticky. The bugs were out so we were coated in bug spray. A couple of the kids were running around catching fire flies and putting them in a jar. Just as the sun set, they were ready to start the show. Everyone gathered together on the front lawn. We sat in the yard drinking sweet tea with the summer humidity leaving it's mark on our skin. As the fireworks were booming just above me I realized that this was perfect. Just how life should be.

And with that, I realized that instead of looking for reasons to be unhappy and dislike Southern Indiana I should be looking for the perfect moments like that.

Also, for what it's worth...the fireworks display last night rivaled that of many small towns!

Friday, June 17, 2011

Five Years Together

5 years ago today I married my best friend. Today we are celebrating 5 more anniversaries than many people said we would have, and we are still going strong. Last night we were chatting with my mom and my husband said he didn't know anyone who had a relationship like ours. <3

I have never shared pictures of myself before, so in honor of our anniversary I am going to share a few pictures from that day.

It was 95 degrees and humid that day!

They threw bird seed and all seemed to collect in my dress!

These are my favorite kids in the whole entire world! The boys will freshman in high school this fall!!

I love this one of the wedding party

Us with our bridesmaids and groomsman

 One of my favorites

Our 1st dance with our parents watching in the background

I wanted fireworks (which I realize is a ridiculous request) and DH wanted a sword tunnel. Our parents surprised  us with this!

Happy anniversary to the love of my life!

Here are a few pictures from the last 5 years:


2008 - Vegas

2009 - Miya Jima Island, Japan

 2010 - Road Trip

2010 - Road trip South Western Colorado

Monday, May 30, 2011

Taking a Moment to Remember on Memorial Day

For love of country they accepted death...  ~James A. Garfield

Today is Memorial Day. It is a day to remember those who have made the ultimate sacrifice for our country. While we are remembering those who gave it all we should think of the families that they left behind as well. They feel the sacrifice each and everyday. 

We should also be taking a few moments to think of those who have served and are serving now. They put their lives on the line for us. 

Today as I have read through my various social networking sites I was very disappointed to see that so many people don't understand the meaning of the holiday. Yes, you got the day off and that is wonderful, but the reason you get your day off is because of those who have served or are serving. And, incidentally, the people that the holiday is all about were probably working today. 

I am so very thankful for everyone who gave their lives and for their families who have been left behind. I remember my grandfather, who was my hero and the man I loved most in the world. He served in World War II and was in a hospital ward for close to a year after being shot twice. I remember my grandmother who soldiered on and raised her oldest son while waiting for my grandfathers safe return. I thank my cousin who is serving and has served for almost 20 years. I am so incredibly thankful for my husband and words can not describe how proud of him I am. And, last but absolutely not least I am thankful for all of military friends who serve or whose spouse serves. Thank you to everyone for your service and sacrifice.

I hope everyone enjoyed their holiday today and I hope everyone took a moment to remember those who gave everything and those who served and are serving. They are the reason we can live in this beautiful country.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 19

Day 19 from the 30 day music challenge is a song from your favorite album...Geez, favorite album, huh? There are so many of them.

I think my favorite album is Everyday from the Dave Matthews Band.

The Space Between by Dave Matthews Band

This album means a lot to me and I love this song. Plus, I have been in love with Dave Matthews for over 10 years now. I honestly would marry him! Shhh...don't tell my husband!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 17 and 18

I'm going to do two days in one today...

Day 17 is a song that you hear often on the radio. This one really depends on which radio station I am listening to.

If I am listening to the hip-hop station I often hear this song lately:

The Man Who Can't be Moved by The Script

If I am listening to the 'a little of everything' station I will often hear this one:

Rolling in the Deep by Adele

And...if I am listening to the rock station I will often hear this:

Jeremy by Pearl Jam

Day 18 is a song that you wish you heard on the radio. I'm sure it is on the radio I just haven't heard it yet, but I wish I heard this song on the radio everyday.

Lotus Flower by Radio Head

Sunday, May 15, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 16

I'm back at it 16 of the 30 day music challenge is a song that you used to love but now hate.

This is a tough one.

This song annoys me now when I hear it, but I had some really good times when I was younger listening to this song with friends.

Tubthumping by Chumbawumba

This is another one that I used to LOVE but now I REALLY don't like it. This was the 1st concert I went to...which is just a little bit embarrassing to say...

Hit me Baby One More Time by Britney Spears

Saturday, May 7, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 15

Day 15 is a song that describes me.I guess it's a little cheesy but it describes my mood the last few days.

Walking on Sunshine

Friday, May 6, 2011

Woosh Woosh Woosh

Sometimes life has a funny way of working out.

After a lot of trying and opk's and loss I am pleased to say that...I am pregnant!

I have known for a few weeks and my beta numbers doubled as they should have, but I have been terrified! This morning I had an appointment with wandy. While we were waiting the doctors office waiting room I couldn't breath. I was shaking and I couldn't focus on anything. Once the ultrasound started and the tech found the little baby my husband squeezed my hand and said it's ok to relax now, but I couldn't. Once I heard that woosh woosh woosh I instantly felt like I could breath again.It was the best sound I have ever heard!

I am 7 weeks and 3 days pregnant and my due date is December 20.

We are excited and thrilled and couldn't be happier. I am still a little nervous, but from what I hear...that's normal .

If you known me in real life or on Facebook, please don't say anything yet. I am not ready to come out to the whole world yet.

30 Day Music Challange - Day 14

I'm still slowly working on the 30 day music challenge...

Day 14 is a song that no one would expect me to love. I am not sure that anything I like would really surprise anyone. I listen to a little of everything. Here is one that might surprise some people though.

Anger and Apathy by As I Lay Dying
I love the gets my blood flowing.

Monday, May 2, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 13

Day 13...a song that is a guilty pleasure. That's an easy one.

Dirty Dancing by NKOTB
It's a guilty pleasure...don't judge me. :)

Sunday, May 1, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 12

Day 12 is a song from a band that you hate. I can't think of a band that I hate, but here is a song from someone that I dislike...a lot.

Baby by Justin Beiber

Enough said.

I don't necessarily hate this band, but this next song makes me crazy!
Back Seat by New Boyz ft. The Cataracs and Dev
The lyrics of this song say, "so I can be a back seat driver" and all I can think is Bitch! If you're a back seat driver your ass is gonna walk! I hate nothing more annoying than someone trying to be a backseat driver! This song makes me crazy!

Saturday, April 30, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 11

A song from my favorite band is day 11 in the music challenge.

My all time favorite band is Dave Matthews Band. I have seen them play live 7 times. I was the weird kid in the 4th or 5th grade who liked the Backstreet Boys, but was OBSESSED with Dave Matthews Band!

Don't Drink the Water by Dave Matthews Band

I love this song! I hope you enjoy it.

Friday, April 29, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 10

Day 10 of the 30 day music challenge is a song that makes you fall asleep.

I hate the quiet! I can't fall asleep when it is quiet. Too bad my husband hates noise when he is trying to sleep. So...I listen to my ipod on the nights when the silence feels a little too immense.

I love to listen to this one as I drift off
The Trapeze Swinger by Iron and Wine

Then, if I really can't sleep I go to this one
Gopala Hare by The Best of Wah

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 9

Day 9 of the challenge is a song you can dance to. It is no secret...I CAN'T dance! I can do the concert know where you bounce up and down with you hand in the air. But really...that's the extent of my dancing.

Not for a lack of trying either. I took dance classes in middle and high school. I can follow a choreographed dance...kind of, but's not pretty.

Here are two songs that I can dance to...


There was a dance I learned in high school to this song too, so I'm sure it would come back to me...maybe.

So there you have it...I am a terrible dancer.

Military Insurance in a Civilian World

The last two weeks I have been on an insurance crusade.

We have military insurance and it is a joke! In the civilian world doctors don't take our insurance because the insurance company is notorious for not paying. This makes the list of doctors who participate rather short.

In January when I was pregnant I found out that there is only one OB in Evansville that is in our network. I made an appt with them. From the start I had nothing but trouble with his office. I called a few weeks before my appt because I was spotting and they blew me off. It took 2 more phone calls that day before they agreed to do an ultrasound. It took me 2 days and 5 phone calls to get my u/s results. They didn't want to do bloodwork. They insisted I was fine.

I was sitting in Dr. Asshole's office while he was telling me that I could be miscarrying or it could be an ectopic pregnancy and he said, "it is not my job to save babies. I know a lot of people think it is, but that's not my job. I don't save babies for a living."

Really?! It's not his job to save babies? Then what is his job?

Now, I am rational person and I know that in many/most cases an early miscarriage like mine can't be "fixed". Many times there isn't anything a doctor can do, but to tell me his job isn't to save babies? Out of line if you ask me! What if I hadn't miscarried and something happened when I was further along in my pregnancy?

So, this week I have been trying to get a new OB approved from my insurance. I had my primary doc put in a referral and I submitted all the appropriate paperwork.

Yesterday I got a letter from my insurance company saying that they are denying my request and they are "redirecting" me to Dr. Asshole. Needless to say...I was pissed!

I called them up and I was informed that part of my insurance agreement is that I will drive up to an hour to see a specialist and there 2 other doc's within an hour of me. They think it is ok to have to drive an hour to deliver a baby (when the time comes of course). Not to mention, these docs are in a completely different state!

I explained to the man on the phone what happened with the last OB and he said that requesting an out of network provider will not be approved simply because I thought the network doc had bad bedside manner.

What I don't understand is how another girl that lives 6 blocks from me and has the same insurance as me got a non-network doc approved. She never even had to endure Dr. Asshole, she requested a different doc based on my experience.

After 2 phone calls and 2 supervisors they resubmitted my request to a "tier 2" manager.

Maybe I am out of line, but I do NOT want to drive an hour to see a doctor and I ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT GO BACK TO DR. ASSHOLE!!!!!

I will call everyday, like I have been for 2 weeks until I get what I want! It should not be this difficult to get decent health care.

Monday, April 25, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 8

Day 8 of the song challenge is a song that you know all the words to. I know all the words to a lot of songs, but these two always makes my husband laugh...and I could really use a good laugh today!

The Devil Went Down to Georgia by Charlie Daniels

Black Betty by Ram Jam

I know every word.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 7

Happy Easter dear blog readers! I hope everyone is enjoying their day, don't eat too many peeps!

Day 7 of the 30 day music challenge is a song that reminds you of an event. This is another that I could go on and on with but I'll keep it to just 2 for today. Enjoy!

Set it Off by Audioslave
This song reminds me of a very interesting night when I was in college. I was in the barracks on the base where my husband (fiance at the time) was living.  I am not going to go into detail because well...I'm not sure I want to air my dirty laundry on here yet. Let's just say it involved me, a couple very large Marines, a 2 story beer bong and trouble unfolded from there... ;)

The Dynamo of Volition by Jason Mraz
This song reminds me of my first day of culinary school. I was nervous and excited and I listened to this the whole morning while I was getting ready and driving there.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 6

Day 6 is a song that reminds you of somewhere.

Hang Me Up to Dry by Cold War Kids
This song reminds me of the beach in San Diego. Oh how I miss that place!

Stellar by Incubus
This one reminds me of the barracks on MCAS Miramar. I used to live in my hubby's barracks room (WAY against the rules) before we got married. We had some really good times and some really good friends.

Blister in the Sun by The Violent Femmes
This song reminds of one of my high school jobs. I worked in a sandwich shop called Roly Poly. We used to play this in the kitchen after the boss left!
This was the picture on the tee shirts that we had to wear!

Friday, April 22, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 5

Day 5 of the 30 day music challenge is a song that reminds you of someone. There are so many songs that remind me of so many people. I'll share a few.

Rockin' the Suburbs by Ben Folds
This song reminds of a good friend from high school. We used to get in her tiny little white Geo Tracker and drive all the back roads with the top off, drinking coffee, singing and just hanging out. We would drive out to this cliff where you could watch the stars at night (like a make out point, if you will) but during the day it wasn just a nice place to hang out.

Summertime by Kenny Chesney
This song reminds me of my BFF. We would drive out to the lake with our feet hanging out the car windows.

Faith by George Michael
This song reminds me of my mom. One morning before school she turned it on in our living room and we danced around in our jammies. I think that was when I really realized that my mom was really cool!

Last one...I promise
If I had a Milion Dollars by Barenaked Ladies
This one reminds me of a few people. My husband and my BFF and a sweet little boy who means the world to me.

Sorry, that was a lot of songs.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 4

I am slowly making my way through this music challenge and I am enjoying it mostly because I am music junkie and I love sitting here and listening to good music trying to decide which song to include. So, Day 4 of the 30 day music challenge is a song that makes you sad.

Brick by Ben Folds's sad, it makes me sad...enough said

Another song that makes me sad is Tears in Heaven by Eric Clapton

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 3

Day 3 of the 30 day music challenge is a song that makes you happy. I am not sure why, but this song always makes me smile and it brightens my day.

Also, the song Sex Therapy by Robin Thicke makes me terribly happy. :)

Monday, April 18, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 2

Day 2 is my least favorite song. I have never really thought about this before, I mean...if I don't like the song, I don't listen to it and I don't usually give it another thought. I am not sure that I truly hate a song, but this one annoys me and makes me giggle. The lyrics just make me cringe a little.

Brad Paisley - Check you for ticks

I couldn't find the real music video so this will have to do.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

30 Day Music Challange - Day 1

A friend of mine posted this on Facebook the other day. I love music and I would be lost without some good tunes in my life. I am going to give this a try, but I am sure it will take longer than 30 days. :)

So, here it is...Day 1 - My favorite song: Everyday by Dave Matthews Band. This song holds a very special place in my heart and the video makes me smile. :)

day 01 - your favorite song
day 02 - your least favorite song
day 03 - a song that makes you happy
day 04 - a song that makes you sad
day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
day 09 - a song that you can dance to
day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
day 11 - a song from your favorite band
day 12 - a song from a band you hate
day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
day 15 - a song that describes you
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
day 19 - a song from your favorite album
day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
day 25 - a song that makes you laugh
day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
day 27 - a song that you wish you could play
day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
day 29 - a song from your childhood
day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Dulce de Leche is Spanish for Amazing

Dulce de leche is the Spanish phrase for AMAZING!

Ok, so not really, but it should be.

Today I made the most perfect chocolate cupcakes, filled them with dulce de leche caramel and topped them with chocolate fudge and sea salt.

The cupcakes were made using coffee instead of water, so they have a little caffeine kick to them. The dulce de leche caramel is sweetened milk that was slowly cooked down to a thick creamy caramel. Once the deliciously caffeinated  cupcakes were cooled I pumped them full of creamy caramel goodness. Last but not least I made a chocolate fudge to top them off and sprinkled just a pinch of sea salt on top.

Now, please excuse me while I slip into my sugar coma...